I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
