I'm really into asian looking animals
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
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