just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Randomize
