Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
