I hate all girls vehemently.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize