he was CRYING into my vagina
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
