I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
