If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
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