I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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