I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
