return my video game
In the future we'll all be gay
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
