i just google imaged poop.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
A bitchslap is in order.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
