4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
