Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Randomize