So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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