Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
