Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
