WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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