I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
