ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
