do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
jump out the window naked night went bad
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
