Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
