Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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