i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
