What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
