I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
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