im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
