DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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