i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
