Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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