Nicole vs. Life
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize
