Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
