Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
