He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
