i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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