no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
