he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
