Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
