I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
