Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Actions speak louder than pants.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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