i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
