remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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