My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
