Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Randomize
