So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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