I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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