does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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