I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
