..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
