You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
