Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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